Tuesday, February 23, 2016

"B" Tutoring Story

It has been a while since my last post -much has changed.  I have recently lost my favorite client, and I am just realizing now how very sad the whole situation leaves me.


"B" STORY

I had been tutoring a young girl, (5 yrs. going on 6 this month) for almost 2 years.  When I first met "B"  she was in a Montessori classroom. Her parents had been frequently meeting with the Director of the school regarding her behavior.  [B has had a crazy medical history of all sorts of diagnosis] which create an internal dissonance of social emotional issues as well as learning issues that leave B acting inconsistently with everyone.  Her challenging behavior in the classroom and at home was so frustrating with her parents, that they moved her to another school, and then they hired me to tutor B with Math and Language -reading and writing. ( I have a crazy degree in Education -ECE with Special Ed. and G/T,  Elementary Ed., and Ed. Psychology -as well as a BA in Art.) 

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MY BACKGROUND to clarify

I recently moved to the Loveland/Ft. Collins area from Denver this past Fall.  I have set up a tutoring business up in Ft. Collins area  for Preschool children with Autism, Asberger's and/or G/T to learn to Read, and work with Math.  

  [I developed and designed a record-keeping system for Montessori and other Alternative Preschools/ Kindergarten's which links Colorado State Standards to the Learning Activities and Cognitive Development of the Montessori materials to the State Standards] 

 I have learned from practical experience, that labels means nothing.  I have found each and every time I have worked with any child, if I compose myself, breathe, stay calm and focused the  child and myself work fine, every time.

Some children are very sensitive to their physical environment, to the feelings of others- even to their own bodies. I worked with a child years ago "S" with Dandy Walker Syndrome which left S so physically developed he was bigger than any other child.  He also had the cognitive development of a toddler, although he was 5 years, he slurred his speech, and drooled most of the time.

S LOVED his classmates; he desired be social with his peers, but every single child in his class feared his presence and would walk away and leave him.  When this happened, he would then throw himself on they ground crying.  He got so upset with himself and what was happening to him that he once threw his head into the bathroom sink, breaking his skin. He did this a few times, before the Para left, and I took over.

I could see and feel S's frustration.  I became very gentle and soft with my words to him.  I used compassion, with his situation:  he is a boy who desires to connect with others, but his physical body and mental body are unwilling to cooperate.   The year went on and S left.  His parents thanked me quite generously for working with him.

And I will be honest -I miss seeing his eye's light up with joy at seeing his friends.
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B STORY CONT'D

My story,  I confess is my disappointment and heartbreak with B's  parents   - that they only desire to see in B what they remember of themselves   - reading big books when they were little.

So when I came to them with my schedule and price set for my tutoring business here in Loveland/Ft. Collins areas with my other tutoring clients -they "poo-pooed"  the idea of everything I was doing. They quipped and stated that their daughter, had no challenges.   Then they without any consideration of the work being done for B, or even my situation, they dropped my services.

I feel completely devastated that these parents forgot B entirely when they chose to let me go.  It is a very sad situation.